Emotions....

I am keeping this blog as a journal of sorts. With that in mind, I hope you will indulge me while I share some of the thoughts that have been going on in my head. This last month I have gone through a roller coaster of emotions. From the joy of seeing my brother return from his mission in Brazil, to the low of some news that has rocked me to the core. I can't seem to grasp which way is up and which way is down. Sometimes, I miss the stability I have felt in the past. But I am so grateful that I have been able to find comfort in the two places that I can always find peace in. The love and peace of my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and my incredible husband, James. I am so blessed with the knowledge that I can always turn to my Heavenly Father for that sense of footing I need, when I seem to lose my way so much. He quietly touches my soul and lets me know that He loves me and is there to carry me when the burdens of this world seem to weigh me down. I can't imagine going a day without feeling that tender love in my life. What an incredible gift I have been blessed with, knowing that I truly am a Daughter of God, and He loves me. No matter what my shortcomings or imperfections are, He is always there.

I am so grateful for the example that the Savior set for me to follow. His life on this earth is such an amazing gift for me to study and try to follow in His footsteps. I can't imagine the pain and hurt He felt but the incredible love that He must also feel for all of us to suffer as He did. From the Last Supper, to the Garden of Gethsemane. From the ultimate betrayal of one of His disciples, to the pain His body went through on the cross. What emotions He must have felt....What anguish must have ran through His soul. Yet, His love for us and His Father carried Christ through those dark hours. Just like it can carry us through those seemingly endless hours of despair, if we will but turn to Him.

I am also so blessed to have a husband who honors his priesthood and tries to show his love for our Heavenly Father and the Savior by never doing anything to that honored gift so that it cannot be taken from him. James truly is an example of a man who does what he preaches. He is humble, honest, and fair in all of his doings. He teaches our children the importance of loving others, service, hard work, and the importance of the gospel. Today, I think I fell further in love with my husband because he was an instrument in providing a gift for someone we love. I will never forget the feeling that entered the room, and in my heart, as I sat there and listened to my husband give an incredible blessing with the aid and love of our Father. The peace and reassurance that this blessing gave was immediate and needed not only for the person receiving the blessing, but as well as the rest of us in the room. I don't know if words can describe how humbled I felt to be a part of something so incredible.

I am so grateful for my Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and my eternal companion. All of them have blessed me with such comfort today and I am truly humbled.

Thank you for allowing me to ramble through and describe my emotions today. I know I am not the most eloquent writer, but my intentions are pure.